New Year New Gear

You like how I did that, with the rhyming and the thing?

We've got a special delivery from Alstyle, our blank shirt provider. I say "special" because even a box of unprinted shirts is exciting to us. It's like a new canvas to a painter. Starting late last year we started using Alstyle for our blanks. We've noticed that they are best and most cost effective shirt which allows us to print shirts that are more comfortable and provide you with a better price.

Also you'll notice that we are printing in more limited quantities. You could call it being more efficient and controlling. Printing less/better shirts lets us control the quality of the shirt as a whole and makes it more personals since we see everyshirt, I'll probably be able to remember when each is sent out like a baby bird leaving the nest. Well, it's not that intense but it does leave us with a more "fine art" style shirt, more artistic, more sincere and less capitalistic. Hopefully you will notice that too as we refine our craft and provide a better product.

When we started out, we were brand new to the shirt printing business. We knew what we wanted to do, and by trial and error and risk-taking we've gotten to a point where we are extremely confident in our ability to offer a shirt that is hands down, one of the best in a very saturated t-shirt market.

Hope you like the taste of what is to come because we're ready to start the new year off with a bizzity bang!

2009 We Hardly Knew Ye, or Wanted Too...

If the decade was the NFL and years were coaches, 2009 would be Jim Zorn. He was put in an impossible situation, it just so happened that he couldn't really do anything about it. The state of the economy is Daniel Snyder, poor 2009 was merely a innocent quarterback coach from Seattle, Washington. Yet 2009 gets the blame and everyone will remember 2009 as a crappy year.

So, let's look forward to 2010. A year with endless possibilities. I personally plan to achieve every single one of my goals this year. I'm setting the bar too low. That's been my biggest problem. Staying organized. Now that's a great new years resolution. Small potatoes if you ask me. You'll organize all of your junk then in a few months you'll be on the show Hoarders and in danger of eviction. Aim higher! Set your goals so high that simply attempting to achieve them, you'll complete some of the lesser goals on the way up.

Rogue Squirrel believes in the power of love. As the great Heuy Lewis once said, "don't take money, don't take fame, don't take no credit card to ride this train, blah blah blah, it might just save your life. It's the power of love." We love our shirts. Our shirts are much like animals in a shelter. If you don't buy/adopt them, we have to put them down. We smuggled in a barrel of that stuff from Who Framed Roger Rabbit, that is used to kill toons. We call it "the Dip". The only thing that can destroy a t-shirt.

Right or wrong, everything in this email is from my own memory of the spelling and facts of WFRR and Mr. Lewis and the News as I am too lazy to look up song lyrics and movie facts. In no way does this reflect the work ethic of Rogue Squirrel or it's subsidiaries.

New Years Roguesolutions

New Years Resolutions brought to you by Rogue Squirrel Apparel.

We bid a fond farewell to 2009 and say hello to 20 el Tigre.

As we here at the Rogue Squirrel compound inside an active volcano look back at 2009. Sipping brandy from our monogrammed snifters, we think back, wondering, pondering...

...Enough of the past, we're about the future.

New designs, new promotional items, new web site, new everything.

We will be printing three new shirts to start off the new year. Rogue Squirrel will pay homage to that most excellent Renaissance inventor and artist, Leonardo Da Vinci, plus a simpler approach to our famous Logo Tee. Not to mention a new long sleeve shirt that will offer something so subtle it will haunt your subconscious.

Our partnership with Limi Boutique has given us the ability to sell scarves and sunglasses on our web site to keep us up to date on the hottest accessories on the planet. Yeah, planet Earth. We look forward to new partnerships, especially our new sponsorship deals with @#$%@^ and &%^@@&^%. Sorry, we can't divulge any info at this time. We can't give away all of our secrets. Rogue Squirrel likes to play it's cards close to it's nuts. Acorns!

In a nutshell, out with the old and in with the new. 2010 will be our years, as 2009 was, and 2008 and part of 2007, since we were incorporated in August.

To our oversees supporters, we love you too! RS World Wide!

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!

TLC is going to H.E. Double Hockey Sticks

TLC or The Learning Channel to the lapers, is going to the anti-heaven.

Exploitation at it's finest. That's the creedo of TLC. I hope I'm not the only one that sees this trend of releasing shows that are just wrong... and kind of funny, but that's only because I'm a tad evil. Just a little.

Jon and Kate plus Eight. MORE! Table for Twelve. MORE POWER!! 18 Kids and Counting. MORTAL KOMBAT!!! TLC, you glorious son of a bitch, you've done it! You've taken ordinary things and made them EXTRAordinary. Everyone loves little kids, then let's giv'em 18 f#$%ing kids! Everyone loves little people. Let's giv'em a couple of little people and watch how they cope with the struggles of a big world. That's for pansies! Let's get a couple of little people and have them work in a CHOCOLATE FACTORY! What's left? We've done a show to supply Dateline: To Catch A Predator with plenty of material by airing Toddlers and Tiaras. We've done a show about little people with little people kids and normal sized kids. We've done a show about a mob boss that bakes cakes. What's left?

I'VE F#$%ING GOT IT!!! A show following an African American family. But let's make them really fat! Cast your Emmy ballots now cause no other show on TV has a chance. We'll name it One Big Happy Family. Get it? Because they're big, and they're happy because they always look at the bright side of their inabilities and appearances. Throw some money at them, edit the footage to make them seem like caricatures of their true selves, then when they become famous enough to be hounded by paparazzi and the family splits up, we'll move on. Then we'll create a show about a family of 20 over weight African American little people who make custom choppers out of chocolate. It will be called "F#$%ING AWESOME"!

TLC, what are you thinking? The Discovery Channel has shows like Deadliest Catch, Dirty Jobs, Shark Week, Man vs. Wild, you know, good stuff.

How is TLC still a network? It'd be ok if they made a few shows following people in extraordinary situations but every freakin show? It's getting ridiculous.

I hate the shows on TLC. That's why the only show I'll watch is Jersey Shore.

I'm Starting to Sympathize With Kanye

Squint some more, Squinty McSquintface!

I watched the worst awards show in the history of awards shows. The AMA's or Ass Masters Awards. JK LOL RMAOLOL SMP WTFBBQ! I meant American Music Awards.

When Kanye jumped up on the stage at the MTV music awards he achieved the honor of Magna Cum Douche, and I admit, I was on the bandwagon. But now, with that little ferret faced Taylor Swift winning all the damn awards the music industry has to offer, I'm seeing the light. You are a visionary Kanye West.

Artists that aren't backed by a nation of hormone charged puberty factories, have to sit in the audience and try not to cuss under their breath because another award went to a 19 year old country pop star. Is that what America loves? County pop stars? I'd move to Canada, but they're responsible for Nickelback.

BTW why does the camera focus on Rascal Flatts during the Jay Z performance and Snoop Dogg during the Keith Urban performance? Way to go AMA's, you've torn down the racial barriers. Mr. Obama we're going to need your Nobel Peace prize back, we've made a mistake. AMA's, you suck!

What a Grind

Over the last two years and some change, Rogue Squirrel has vended, networked, did fashion shows and supported other groups’ events up and down the east coast of the United States. We’ve had design meetings, product meetings, venue meetings, sales meetings, money meetings and conference calls. It is pretty safe to say that we know or at least have a slight idea of what it is to be on the grind.

Just when we thought we have fully embraced the grind we were privileged to hear an interview from a guy from the ATL that blows any of the grinding that RS has been doing out of the water. Here he tells the world his story while he advertises his new business. Like to hear it, here it go. (Interview courtesy of the Ricky Smiley Morning Show)

Political Campaigns: The Rogue Squirrel Edition

It's been the same way for as long as I can remember. Political candidates, bashing their opponents to promote themselves. What's confusing to this voter is the methods used by grown men and women to acquire votes.

This person hates babies and punches midgets during happy hour at a bar owned by a Nazi sympathizer. The way I see it, these high school-type squabbles perpetrated by adults, shouldn't be encouraged. Yet, they are still a normal means of campaigning, so I'm left with screaming at the TV and running full speed into a brick wall repeatedly to try and inflict enough mental damage to put me on the level of these idiots.

Political candidates are applying to serve as our voice in the government. Technically they should be working for us. So we'd be their boss. This way of thinking doesn't seem too crazy. What if I walked into a job interview and started stating the faults of the other applicants.

"I heard that the guy that interviewed before me was caught slapping quadriplegic babies."

For some crazy reason, I don't think that course of action would find me happily employed.

The candidates, and I'm specifically speaking about, but not limited to, the Virginia gubernatorial race. Bob McDonnell treats women like a episode of Mad Men. Creigh Deeds lies about taxes and pees on the truth. It's a little aggravating when we the voters are berated by negativity. How about Bob McDonnell come forward and say that Deeds is a fine dancer and enjoys a nice sunset. Creigh Deeds could campaign for the way McDonnell's demeanor tickles the heart like butterfly kisses from angels. Probably not going to happen, but just a small cross-section of how ass backwards the American political scene appears. They are forcing us to vote for the lesser of two evils. One candidate farts on cancer patients but the other slips a powerful laxative into the soup at homeless shelters.

Even during debates the candidates argue like children caught drawing on the walls with permanent marker. Their immaturity knows no bounds. I find myself voting on the stability of a candidate's hair cut. I bet the campaign managers of each candidate were picked on relentlessly in school. Poor guys, they just want to exact their revenge at the expense of millions of lives.